This is why we can't have nice things

I cannot believe all the stupidity that is contained in a 1:13 min video. Rep Joe Barton asks US Secretary of Energy and Nobel Laureate (physics) Steven Chu where oil comes from. Dr Chu basically laughs at the shear stupidity of the question. I guess it's his job to be a high school teacher for elected officials.
Rather than knowing how dumb of a question he just asked he is proud that he "stumped" the Secretary. His Twitter page: "I seemed to have baffled the Energy Sec with basic question - Where does oil come from? Check out the video: http://bit.ly/O4m0p #tcot"

How does the highest ranking Republican on the Energy and Commerce Committee not understand plate tectonics?
I know this is in the States, but this doesn't give me much hope for the future seeing as Canada apparently has equally dumb elected officials.

Stupidity Strikes Again

Not this shit again. Conservative MP James Lunney has decide to spout off some creationist stupidity in parliament.

Let's breakdown his statement to see just how wrong he is:

"Mr. Speaker, recently we saw an attempt to ridicule the presumed beliefs of a member of this House and the belief of millions of Canadians in a creator. Certain individuals in the media and the scientific community have exposed their own arrogance and intolerance of beliefs contrary to their own."

No one has ridiculed anyone's beliefs. Canadian Minister Gary Goodyear was rightful ridiculed for turning a scientific question (evolution) into an issue of religion. This man is our Minister of State for Science and Technology! Ugghhh.

"Any scientist who declares that the theory of evolution is a fact has already abandoned the foundations of science. For science establishes fact through the study of things observable and reproducible. Since origins can neither be reproduced nor observed, they remain the realm of hypothesis."


First, theories are not facts. Theories are a set of intellectual tools we use to articulate and apply to our daily endeavors.

Second, no one is claiming evolution can explain the origin of the organisms. Evolution can help explain why they change. He is 0-2 in this statement with respect to a lack of comprehension.

"In science, it is perfectly acceptable to make assumptions when we do not have all the facts, but it is never acceptable to forget our assumptions. Given the modern evidence unavailable to Darwin, advanced models of plate techtonics, polonium radiohalos, polystratic fossils, I am prepared to believe that Darwin would be willing to re-examine his assumptions. The evolutionists may disagree, but neither can produce Darwin as a witness to prove his point."

This is where the crazy comes on strong. His examples of plate techtonics, polonium radiohalos and polystratic fossils are all complex topics that only appear to be problematic to evolution if you're ignorant, or shilling Creationism.
Also I love how he believes that he knows what Darwin would think. But really, who gives shit what Darwin thinks, its not like what he thinks would matter. If we could resurect Darwin and he agreed, would that invalidate the all the work in biology since his death?

"The evolutionists may genuinely see his ancestor in a monkey, but many modern scientists interpret the same evidence in favour of creation and a creator."

Wrong again. There is no debated among modern scientists about (young earth) creationism (Claiming the earth is only about 6000 to 10 000 years old). Belief in young earth creationism implies either humans lived with dinosaurs or dinosaur bones fake (and where planted by Satan to fool humantity). I don't think you'll find scientists debting these facts.













Evolution neither denies nor requires a role of an original creator. Setting up science and religion as enemies hurts everyone. Idiots like James Lunney are doing it only create wedge issues to win votes.

Twitter and Scientology.

I've just jumped on this strange and unusual Twitter bandwagon. I imagine it's similar to when I switched from ICQ to MSN and I told my friends, that MSN woud never take off since ICQ is obviously superior... I imagine in one year from now I'll say what was that book of face we used to use. Oh technology, I don't understand you but you own me.

I randomly stumbled upon this website today and I do believe that my favorite article was The Top 10 Secret Celebrity Scientologists. Although I must admit I knew all of them but two... However I won't spoil it, you should check it out yourself. I wonder if Scientology is like Twitter and although right now it feels wrong in a few years it might be the norm.

I love that song

By now everyone and their grandma has least tried to play one song from RockBand or Guitar Hero. Both of theses titles are rhythm music games which happen to have awesome soundtracks. But the grandfather of modern rhythm based games is the unforgettable Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!!











My love of old games leads me to finding this new video:


Man that tune sounds good even after 20 years. Game is out May 18th

THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF YEAR!!

This post is for all of you who mark it on calender, who believe that work should be cancelled and school should be on a small hiatus to sit on the couch and enjoy the best amateur athletic event of the world!! THE NCAA TOURNAMENT IS UPON US!!!

For all of you who don't care, well screw you and the carriage full of books you rode in on!!

because this is awesomeness at its APEX!!

There will be great wins, predictable wins and great failures! like this guy!

I bet you that this guy wishes he had a TV rather then a computer during this time as well since he doesn't seem to busy!!

Anyhow, get your butt in your favourite chair, forget about your gf or bf until Monday and relax and enjoy the competition!

on a side note, how awesome is it that this cop is just playing solitaire in his car, what a life portable fun and carry a gun!!!!

well til next time, keep your hand off the remote and your cell phone turned off cause its game time!

Stupidity at Home

In my various internet travels I found this lovely little tidbit. Canadian Minister Gary Goodyear "won't confirm belief in evolution." Now this wouldn't brother me at all, except that he is the Minister of State for Science and Technology!!
A science minister that doesn't believe in the fundamentals of science. Are you fucking kidding me?












He then clarifies (after a shit-storm of bad press coverage) "of course" he believes in evolution, but he should not have to answer that question because "anybody asking a question about my religion is appropriate.”
I'm sorry I can't ask my Science Minister what he believes is scientifically relevant? We need to know these things to maintain bias-free science in our country. Other countries are not so lucky.
















How does Canada, one of the top countries in the world in science, have a Science Minister that is a chiropractor (albeit a very successful chiropractor) while the US has a Secretary of Energy who won the Nobel prize in physics? This guy's particular beliefs don't bother me, what bothers me is that we have many competent scientists in the Canada who are more qualified to serve than this guy. We should expect our government to appoint qualified individuals.

The Beans Don't Burn on the Grill

Previously (possibly on another blog) I wrote about my excitement for the movie Funny People, which I might have called my most anticipated movie of 2009. In case you haven't realized it yet, I exaggerate all the time. And if we're not dear friends you probably didn't know about my tendancy to exaggerate in the same way you are not aware of my ridiculous love for Dave Eggers. The man could make greatness out of coat hangers -- this is not an exaggeration, I'm pretty sure he could write a magical story about coat hangers. It would undoubtedly leave me breathless and inspired and then just as I was recovering from the brilliance of his written word he would create some kind of charity for people in third world countries who don't have coats...or hangers.... or food. Seriously the man is unbelievable... and he just directed a forty minute short with James Franco. Seriously, unbelievable this man is.
Anyhoo, enough of a rant, where I'm going is that Dave Eggers wrote (or helped write) the screenplay for Where The Wild Things Are, which might be my most anticipated movie of 2009. Spike Jonze directed it, Catherine Keener, Paul Dano, Catherine O'Hara are all in it, it's going to be glorious and after a few rumors that they had to re cut the whole thing, we finally have a trailer. Of course it's not a trailer that we can see right at this moment but at least the promise of a trailer that someday we will watch. Thus, I change my most anticipated movie of 2009 to Where The Wild Things Are.... at least until tomorrow. Or at least until the trailer comes out for This Side of the Truth.

Sidenote: I do believe in this blog I compensated for my tendancy to exaggerate by over linking to everything. I apolagize. I just really like giving you links. Like this one.

Basketball Homerism

The boys from must be congratulated. The Timmins High Blues Senior boys basketball team(ranked 11th of 16 teams) began their quest to towards the OFSAA "AA" championship this week, with a win over the #2 ranked Westminster S.S. (London) . With Two additions wins yesterday, they made it the semifinals thus guaranteeing this year's team a medal. They played this morning against #3 St. Thomas Aquinas (Oakville) and unfortunately lost. They play tonight at the TH gym in front of what is assured to be a ruckus crowd. For all those who want to see the bronze medal game and cannot be there in person the game is being shown via webcast. GO BLUES!

Getting crazy on this here interweb!

Okay you guys, I know you're flipping sick of Kitty Cams or Carly-washing-the-dishes Cams. I've got just the thing for you: SCC CAM!

That's right friends, you can now watch Supreme Court hearings on the INTERNET. That shit's bananas! I don't know if justice is as cute as a Shiba Inu puppy, but what I'm saying is: SHE'S AS CUTE AS A SHIBA INU PUPPY.

Watch it - it's like Law and Order, only with more robes and less awesome.

Music that makes you dumb

A Cal Tech grad student did an study correlating SAT score vs musical preferences.
I am aware SAT tests are not an accurate representation of intelligence and this study obviously isn't very scientific, but its kinda interesting to see where the bands/styles are located.

As a Pink Floyd, Radiohead and Zeppelin fan I'm represented fairly well. (That's not to say I don't listen to Weezy and Luda. I just listent to more classic rock)
Where are your musical preferences? Does it correlate well with your intelligence?

Sorry for the delay!

Sorry about the delay folks Ive been a busy student, as well as travelling home to the great white north to visit family and I am back, to give you this amazing video!

where I have no idea what they are saying, but I bet its along the lines of something sexual and inappropriate and he is probably sleeping with her but she doesn't want anyone to know!!

Further, I would like to comment on babies. Yes, babies, I'm pretty sure babies have the best life in the entire world, you get to do what you want when you want, you get to sleep 18 hours a day, get meals from boobs, and don't even have to get up to take a crap!! It's like my life long dream!! If only i could win a massive amount of money and hire some like this to be the person takes care of me! I say this because I am a new uncle to a baby boy I have just met recently and was completely amazed at how much of a great life being a kid must be!

On a final note, does the hockey trade deadline really have to take over my 24 hour a day sports channel to tell me who gets traded in a sport which I don't really care that much about? Why not just leave it to the little feeder line at the bottom for the day so I can watch my sports highlights on a continuous feed over and over again like I do everyday!

Well, til next time ladies and gentlemen, and keep it trashy Canada cause that's where the funniest things in life are!

Hilarity Ensues.

Today at work, my lovely girl Anna sent me this video. I laughed so hard, I almost fell off the chair.
I think everyone in the world has seen this but if you haven't, enjoy.

March is Gonna Rock

So much stuff comes out in March.
Here is a list of the goodness:
March 6, Watchmen (Movie)

The graphic novel was amazing, hopefully they don't fuck up the movie!

March 13 Resident Evil 5 (Game)

March 11 Season 13 of South Park (TV)

Unlike the Simpsons, South Park episodes have not sucked as the seasons went on.


March 8 Breaking Bad (TV)
















Chemistry+ Crystal Meth + Gangs= Quality drama


And Finally March 19 The Tourney












It's the most wonderful time of the year

Crazy Game Endings

I played a bball game tonight and we came back from a 10 points deficit in 1:45 min to force OT. OT was sudden death (weird rule, I know), but we pulled out the victory. I lost my voice screaming. Great time.

But that still isn't as good as this high school game which has one kid score 11 points in only 46 seconds to win the game. I love crowd rushing the the floor at the end.

hat tip deadspin

God of War III

This is why I own a PS3


It's Edu-tainment because I'm learning about Greek mythology. (caution violence above)

Finally a news organization agree that violent video games teaches kids valuable skills!


Are Violent Video Games Adequately Preparing Children For The Apocalypse?

Coco read????

I am just kidding, there are numerous things I wish I could have had when I was a budding high school student.

The Game by Neil Strauss, is an epic tail of men and their conquests over in the harsh world.... haha.... who I am kidding, its about how to pick up girls using this ridiculous techniques, but honestly its an awesome book, the guy in the book has some of the craziest stories ever including celebrities and just adventures that don't even seem like they could happen to a guy who looks like the writer actually does.

Bigger Faster Stronger, yes a movie, which dives into steroid abuse and names all sorts of people who have done it, it would have helped me tremendously to know that hulk hogan was taking steroids and that I could not be that big no matter how hard I tried, or that Governor Arnold juiced up and in turn became one of the most famous people ever through movies, Mr Universe and now as a Politician. Damn you steroids for making me want something I can't have.

The Wire, yes this show has given me an in depth look at crime from both sides, as well as new language skills which I could have used in my first year at university meeting people of all sorts of backgrounds. Being a northern Ontario kid does not prepare you for the urban language you learn at university and those first few times you just seem out of place!

The office, another TV show which I would have loved to have because of the humour I have learned from it, not just the THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!! remarks, but the sarcasm, the hilarity of being a dark person like Creed or that being a slut (Meredith) is not just something I wasn't into in high school but now is HILARIOUS and so many more jokes could be had at their expense!!!

Lastly, I wish for a younger me to have read historical books on world history, Canadian history and war, because not only would it have made my first university degree a lot easier, but because it gives you a sense of the country, and why things are the way they are, and how they got there, because watching movies leaves out almost all of the coolest stuff for some reason.

I would love to have named more books, but I tend to forget the names of books I have read, and can only think of school texts which I am covered in right now and articles which lay across my bed and I use as insulation under my blankets, but I believe the things I did name would help a younger me become a funnier, smarter, and more well rounded person which would lead to my own version of THE GAME !!!

Response to the response

This is why it’s hard to be a scientist. I've read the many required textbooks classes and nothing that I have read in any of my chemistry classes can ever apply to my past self. Nothing. Regardless several titles I could have checked out earlier:

On the Genealogy of Morality by Nietzsche and Dostoevsky's Notes from the Underground (books)

- Helps understand and enjoy the weird things in life, just for the sake of being weird.

The Watchmen - Alan Moore (graphic novel)

- I don't know if my younger old self would appreciate the story, but it is the best comic book series I've ever read.

"Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television" - George Carlin (album)

- Classic comedy album that is still relevant today. "Those [words] are the ones that'll infect your soul, curve your spine and keep the country from winning the war."

It's Like Christmas but Even More Awesome.

This is the best news I've ever heard. Be still my heart.

You Know What I Love About Those High School Boys...

I’m starting to wonder if this blog should just be a permanent link to the Onion’s AV Club…Sadly, I’ve begun judging potential mates on how similar they are to this magical site. Basically someone who is ridiculously interesting, offers up new tidbits of wisdom, hilarity and delightful observations on a regular basis, and isn’t too pretentious.

In conclusion, I might be alone forever.

I really love the idea of suggesting books or music or films to high schoolers graduating from University, even though I’m quite sure I have the same maturity and intelligence of most high schoolers (and who are we kidding I still have a huge thing for high school boys… does that make me a pedophile? Or rather does that make me cool and only slightly creepy like Mathew Mcconaughey from Dazed and Confused?)

Anyhoo, if I could go back to awkward, chubby nineteen year old Kara as awkward, chubby twenty five year old Kara, I would tell her to read these books and see these films. These choices are quite lady geared so if you are a nineteen/eighteen year old boy who has stumbled across this blog, these might not be useful for you… but if you skateboard or have hair similar to Zac Efron please leave your phone number in the comments section.

Franny and Zooey (Book)
o The last four pages will be so so so important for all those crazy, unanswerable spiritual questions stirred up by those crazy years at bible camp.

Girls Guide to Fishing and Hunting (Book)
o This book will make you laugh and cry and leave you both hopeful and scared for the future. Proximity without Intimacy…ah awkward Kara, learn it.

Before Sunrise, Before Sunset (Film)
o These movies will make you realize you’re not alone, and that love and people and conversations and life are complicated and hypocritical and just plain awesome.

Harold and Maude (Film)
o Although I never was close to driving a Hearst off a cliff, I’m pretty sure I would have loved life more if I had seen this film a bit earlier on in life.

Yo blogging friends, you should do the same. Make some suggestions to high school Boots, Coco and Carly. Note: Carly your answer better not include Sweet Valley High.

Shark Tanks are Fire Hazards

Tracy Morgan's apartment fire was caused by his shark-tank.
FYI: This just makes me love him even more.

I had a pet tiger once, but he was kind of a bitch.

Where is the creativity or is everything Pre Scripted??

So as of late I have been questioning everything, I dunno if it's because of my State and Government class and the readings of people like Lemke and Foucault or I have just been noticing it now more then ever. Anyways, to the point but is everything in the world scripted? Shaq and Kobe recently made up at All Star Weekend from there so called feud that was supposedly made up for the last 4 1/2 years . Are you kidding me? who makes up a war between people in sports, I don't really see an advantage to it but to keep your name in the public's perspective and I really don't think Kobe needs to be a part of any controversy for the rest of his career thanks to that lady in Colorado.

"what does kobe bryant have for thanksgiving? a lil white meat on the side"

Anyhow, so here they are together again, friends joking around as if nothing has happened in the past years, as if Shaq didn't ask him how his ass tastes? And so this huge media affair occurs and bless them for putting this past them ya da ya da ya da.... But of course the pre scripted bull begins, they get CO-MVP honours for the All star game?? Come on, really? WOW this is more scripted then a WWE match! Do we have any sort of creativity anymore? come on, like you didn't have to just throw it in our faces that they are back together but you had to arrange it so they shared the MVP of the game as well? Damn you David Stern !!

Secondly, after my much long listening to Kanye West over his last few albums he has given me a different outlook on life;

Life is not like jerking off. Jerking off is philosophy. Your hand never turns you down, you’re never too ugly, too fat, or too Mexican. When you close your eyes, and reach down to pleasure your gender specific genitalia, you can picture yourself as the one you need to blow to get a drink around here. You’re not going to go blind, well, maybe for a minute or two if you get it in your eye. You’re never going to hurt anyone by doing it. Kanye West is different, Kanye sucks.

You see, after his latest album, and his attempt at singing which anyone can do these days thanks to this program I have become enamored by attempting to find where Kanye gets his beats since I knew before of his sampling technique. And where did I find this answer? A wonderful fan made up this YouTube video which links all his songs to the sample beat. Ahhhh millions of dollars made off of music that is not even yours, how I love our society and the ways we can use others successes to create more success except as we know the artists of today pump out an album every 8 months or so unless you are like Kiss, or Guns N Roses who take a notoriously long time but I am pretty sure they write and make up there own hits which will last for generations rather then being on the top 100 list for a few weeks.

On a side note, Roseanne is amazing for her comments on Chris Brown,

Any who, my rant is over like Alex Rodriguez's chance at the Hall of Fame!

I don't know what but Steve Irwin's daughter really irritates me. Does this make me a horrible person? Probably. It's like my hatred for Anne Hathaway, I can't pinpoint the hatred but it's quite deep rooted and seems to come from a noble place. Such a noble place that if I was to see either of them on the street I would kick them right in their too smiley, stupid faces.

Profiles in Trolling

I have comment on Khaf's last post post about Joaquin Phoenix.
That interview flows perfectly into a new series called: "PROFILES IN TROLLING"

















For the uninitiated, trolling is occurs when any person who purposely and intentionally attempts to cause disruption or controversy. A troll deliberately exploits tendencies of human nature to upset people. The people being trolled usually don't know they are being trolled.
Probably the best way to explain trolling is by showing examples.
Acting racist/sexist for laughs is considered trolling but simply being a racist/sexist is not.














This brings us back the interview. Joaquin Phoenix could be pulling off a very impressive troll, no one gets the joke except for himself. Or he simply could be crazy, that wouldn't be as entertaining.

What I Missed While Hanging Out With Naked Ladies Pt.2

I also was quite excited to come back to this hilarious clip of Joaquin Phoenix on Letterman. Is it a joke? Is it real? Anyone? Anyone? I don't really care either way, I'm just excited to hear this hip hop album he's working on. 

The other beautiful thing about the above clip is it's Letterman being old school vintage awesome Letterman. Thus in that vein I thought I would share this below classic and also a Crispin Glover video that needs to be watched immediately after watching the Letterman interview. It will hopefully make you laugh but also probably like me, throw up a bit in your mouth. 

What I Missed While Hanging Out With Old Naked Ladies

Seeing as I've been out of the pop culture loop for exactly nineteen days (two of which where spent in large baths with old naked ladies) I've spent the first three hours of 'family day' catching up. I began my morning (after coffee and a cigarette) reading all of my missed Entertainment Weeklies which I found in a beautiful stack on my kitchen counter. They seemed so lonely I could hear their little adorable magazine voices, "Please Kara take me in the bathroom and read me" ... so I did. I really missed North American toilets.  

The news I was most excited about in said Entertainment Weeklies was the fact that Demetri Martin's show Important Things with Demetri Martin is awesome and kicking ass.   I watched the entire episode this morning and it's brilliant. I always knew Demetri would do great things. Little known fact, I've seen him do stand up twice. And true story once was with my mom. She laughed so hard she almost fell off her chair. She was, of course, hammered. I think it still proves two things 1. Mr. Martin is hilarious and 2. While intoxicated my mother has poor balance. 

Dicks on the Dance Floor

In order to introduce myself as blogger #4, to this blog dedicated to the incoherent ramblings of a few northern Ontario Misfits I thought I would discuss two of my favorite subjects, Flight of the Conchords and Penises. I disagree a bit with the first video as I often feel like there aren't enough dicks on the dance floor. And the second video is quite wise as I was seriously considering prostitution. It might be my only chance at riches, blogging isn't paying as well as I had hoped.

Warm up your shotgun

'Cause Resident Evil is almost back!











Resident Evil 5 continues the long and successful series as it moves on too the newest generation of game consoles. As someone who as played the series since its inception way back in 1996, I'm incredibly pumped for this release. The current game focuses on the primary characters traveling to Africa trying to hunt down another source of "infected". Now some people have called the game racist because the trailer depicted the white protagonist in fending off black zombies. The previous game had me pumping lead into Spaniards. I didn't have a problem doing that because NEW FLASH if your a zombie I am shooting you in the face regardless of race, gender, or number of limbs. The fact is the whole game isn't even out and people complaining. How can you complain without playing the game? There are only trailers and a two level demo. I'll reserve judgment till after I've completed the release copy.

Speaking of the demo I recently downloaded the free demo to play on the PS3. Fantastic graphics. The RE series it has lost some of the survival horror game play and replaced it with a more action based strategy which works well since the game is two player co-op. Talking with someone via headset immerses the player and forces you not too just not worry about yourself but also our partner.

Blasting zombies with a friend. I think my march 13th is booked.

Fuck Land I'm on a BOAT!

2 words for the entire blog today

CLICK THIS!